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warikoo Wanderings

The biggest pressure of all...

Published over 2 years ago • 3 min read

warikoo Wanderings

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THE BIGGEST PRESSURE IN LIFE


Nothing feels worse than letting those down who are the closest to you.
Especially your parents.

When I came back to India after dropping out of my PhD from the US, the biggest burden on me was crushing the expectations my parents had from me and my life.
For 8 years, all that I had spoken about and worked towards was: PhD, US, NASA, Space Scientist.
And now here I was - aged 24, clueless, directionless, confused.
The one who had let down his parents.

The expectations were not just around my career.
They were around how we were as a family, as well.

We come from a very humble background. Never had any excess money. It was always hand to mouth existence.
We had lived all our life in debt, just trying to make ends meet.
Me going to the US was meant to change all of that.
I was going to change our orbit.
Bring stability to our life.
Much needed financial liberty.

All of that seemed to have gone to the dumps, because of my return.

And I remember feeling guilty. Selfish. Self-centered.
I felt small. I felt inadequate.
I felt I hadn't played the role of a son the way I was supposed to.

Today, I am wiser.
And here is what I have realized.

All I ever wanted, was for my family to be happy.
And happiness takes multiple shapes in our life - it could be happiness due to relationships, due to money, due to status, due to stability, due to fulfilment.
BUT - before you can make or keep anyone else happy, YOU need to be happy.

And the decision I had made, to come back to India, was a decision that made me happy.
Immensely happy.
I had no regret.
Fear, yes. Uncertainty, yes.
But no regret. No unhappiness.
I was at peace with the decision.

I am grateful that things worked out for me and my parents are (I think so) proud of me today :)
But even if they hadn't, I am certain I would have found ways of keeping them happy.
Because I had attended to the most important person first.
Me!

HOW TO GET RICH BEFORE 30


A fun question asked on Instagram, became a reel and now a podcast episode.
3 ways to get rich before you turn 30 :)

You can give it a listen on Spotify, Amazon Music, Google Podcast, Apple Podcast, JioSaavn or Gaana.
My podcasts are now on YouTube as well - because so many of you asked for it.

BOOK I AM READING THIS WEEK


I finished reading Harsh Realities - an autobiography of Harsh Mariwala (founder of Marico) and moved on to another biography of my favorite Roger Federer.

The Master: The Brilliant Career of Roger Federer

Rafa for me, is the greatest Tennis player ever. He also comes across as a nice human being. And I am loving his journey, through this book. It is written by John Murray, who is considered to be the best tennis journalist in the world. Beautifully written and if you are a tennis and Rafa fan - then a must read!

QUOTES TO SHARE


The reason you are unhappy, is because you are living someone else's definition of your life.
(Share on Twitter)

The reason you procrastinate, is because you think you still have time.
(Share on Twitter)

The reason you are still in it, is because you do not know who you would be without it.
(Share on Twitter)

The reason it needs motivation, is because you do not feel progress when you do it.
(Share on Twitter)

The reason it is boring, is because you have to become someone else to do it!
(Share on Twitter)

RESPONSES TO LAST WEEK'S QUESTION


Last week I asked you:

Who makes your investment decisions for you?

  1. My parents
  2. My spouse
  3. My financial advisor
  4. Suggestions from friends/co-workers
  5. Suggestions from the world outside
  6. Me, myself

Here are the results:

Some observations:

  1. Number of responses is much lower than usual. My hunch is because the rest do not invest :)
  2. Me/Myself is the dominant category across all age groups - very interesting.
  3. As parents go down, spouses and financial advisors take over. Which is actually smart. The risk profile of parents is VERY different from yours, so listening to them (FD karwa lo) is mostly going to be poor advice!
  4. Suggestions from outside is quite high and constant. Didn't expect that!
  5. Friends and co-workers are mostly useless :))

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION


​How much time do you spend with yourself daily?
Without any phone, book, music, gadget, person - nothing. Just you and your thoughts.
Not day dreaming! :)
Actually thinking actively. About things.

  1. Don't spend time with myself
  2. Less than 15 minutes daily
  3. Between 15-30 minutes
  4. Between 30-60 minutes
  5. More than 60 minutes

Click here to let me know your answer (anonymously)​​​

You can, of course, always write to me, by simply replying to this newsletter. I love reading all your emails, even though I may not be able to reply to them all.
Yes! I READ ALL MY EMAILS. ALL OF THEM.
​​(Breakfast mein bread pakodon ki kasam!)

CONTENT I SHARED THIS WEEK


The one advice that changed my life (YouTube)

Real-life lessons I learnt from Stock Investing (YouTube)

What is invoice discounting? (YouTube)

Are you an introvert? (IGTV)

BTS of how therapists manage emotions (IGTV)

Biggest mistake of my career (Reel)

Life is about two choices (Reel)

Making the same mistake again (LinkedIn)

Still chose to trust (LinkedIn)

You can share this newsletter on WhatsApp, Twitter, LinkedIn or view it on the web.

Read all previous editions of the newsletter here.

warikoo Wanderings

by Ankur Warikoo

Entrepreneur, Author, Content Creator with 9M+ followers across platforms. I share this newsletter every Friday around personal growth, books, quotes, pictures - it is the most personal version of me online.

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