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warikoo Wanderings

Get rid of such friends

Published over 2 years ago • 3 min read

warikoo Wanderings

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THE WRONG KIND OF FRIENDS


Friends have long been gloried in our culture. We have grown up listening to stories of Krishna & Sudama, then came along Sholay and "yeh dosti hum nahi todenge" and then Dil Chahta Hai, where coming back to friends is what true friends do.

And while this is a wonderful approach towards life that I would never dismiss, I do think it disregards the fact that some friends are bad for you!

We are somehow never trained or taught how to identify such friends. Instead, we are made to feel guilty if such a though even crosses our mind.

Here are 3 kind of friends you should get rid of.

1. Those who ask you for your views, and then judge you for sharing them!

We all have such friends, don't we?
Who will ask us something and the minute we share our response will go, "hawwwwwww! WHAT??"

In fact, I would go ahead and say, take out everyone in your life that asks you for your views and then dismisses you upon hearing it.
They never cared about their view. They cares about whether your view aligns with theirs or not.

2. Those who think it is your responsibility to keep them happy

You know those friends who say, "Oh you are never around when I need you", "Oh you just don't know how to lift me up", "How come you never know what is the right thing to say?"

If you have anyone in your life who thinks it is YOUR responsibility to make them happy, run away as fast as you can, my friend!
You should be in a relationship where you want to keep the other person happy, not HAVE to keep the other person happy.

3. Those who aren't truly happy when you succeed

Here is the truth about friendship. A lot of people say that your best friends are the ones that are there for you when you are down and about. When you are low, dejected, disheartened.
I believe that your best friends are the ones who are truly happy for you when you succeed. When you are happy. When you are at your best.

Because the hardest thing for a human, is to see someone else win!
We are just hard-wired that way.

So if you have friends who are NOT happy when you are happy, they are not your friends.
They are jealous/envious of you.
And someday, that emotion of theirs will take over.

It is a wonderful thing to have a friendship that allows you to be who you wish to be, cares for you, craves for you, adores you, wishes the best for you and in the journey helps you become the best version of you.
Finding such friendships makes for a fulfilling life.
And that starts with eliminating the friendships that aren't friendships.

BOOK I AM READING THIS WEEK


This week I am reading Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smart

Last week, one of my ex-colleagues from nearbuy shared this image on WhatsApp.

The image hit hard, because I could instantly identify myself as the Pacesetter and thus harming the team I intend to nurture. So I ordered the book right away and started reading it. Pretty gripping so far. Learning a lot.

PS1: I also shared the list of my top books of 2021 in this YT video. Catch it to get the list.
PS2: If you are looking to gift something to your parents this winter, this list might help :)

QUOTES TO SHARE


Professionals stop growing the day they stop asking questions.
Organizations stop growing the day they stop encouraging questions.
(Share on Twitter)

Sometimes all it takes for you to believe in yourself, is for someone else to believe in you.
(Share on Twitter)

Risk and failure is not absolute. It is a state of mind.
(Share on Twitter)


RESPONSES TO LAST WEEK'S QUESTION


Last week I asked you

How many books did you read in 2021?

  1. None
  2. 1-3 books
  3. 4-6 books
  4. 7-10 books
  5. 10+ books

Here are the results

Some observations

  1. In general people read more, as they grow old. Which makes sense as well, no?
  2. The average books people read in every age band comes to between 4-6 books a year. Which honestly is a pretty good average
  3. As one grows old, lesser and lesser people tend to not read books at all

I have highlighted the highest share for each age band, so that you can compare yourself with the poll results and see where you stand :)

PICTURE OF THE WEEK


I went to Bahrisons Bookstore in Saket to sign some copies of my book and met Mohan, who manages the store. Got a picture clicked :)

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION


How was 2021 for you?

  1. Better than 2020
  2. Worse than 2020
  3. Same as 2020

​Click here to let me know your answer (anonymously)​​​​

CONTENT I SHARED THIS WEEK


Podcast:
Title of episode: Everyone is out there to help you
Spotify, Amazon Music, Google Podcast, Apple Podcast, JioSaavn or Gaana.

YouTube:
Title of video: Investment tips and tricks w/ Akshat Shrivastava
You can watch it here.

Instagram:
Title of video: 3 ways to get people to like you
You can watch it here.

You can, of course, always write to me by simply replying to this newsletter.

I love reading all your emails, even though I may not be able to reply to them all.
Yes! I READ ALL MY EMAILS. ALL OF THEM.
​​(Sardiyon ki dhoop mein mungphali ki patti khaane ki kasam!)

warikoo Wanderings

by Ankur Warikoo

Entrepreneur, Author, Content Creator with 9M+ followers across platforms. I share this newsletter every Friday around personal growth, books, quotes, pictures - it is the most personal version of me online.

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